Sorry my minions, but I will be out of commission for a few days or so. My back is literally giving me a very hard time so I'm going to be taking it easy for a while. If you get bored, you can always read my old shit.
Please don't lose hope. I will drag my silly ass back to my computer when I can sit without pain.
I just couldn't help but post this cartoon I saw. Rick Prick Perry, our lunatic Governor of Texas, has said he is running for President. I am only going to tell y'all once and only once. Do Not Vote For This Asshole! He's a fucking nut case. He makes me look sane. So please take my advice. Stay far, far away from him.
Yesterday the city was asking everyone to please water their trees really good because of the bad drought we are having. So this morning I have been busy watering the two pecan trees and the empress tree. that means fighting with the fucking hoses and sprinklers and all that crap. I expect to be sweating my ass off as usual because of the humidity again. So my mood today is of coarse soggy. I really should go find my swimsuit and one of my sarongs and wear that all day. I would be comfortable.
Interesting shit happening: yesterday we had a water main break in front of my house. Lucy and I were sitting outside, enjoying the afternoon when Lucy got up and started barking. Now understand this, she doesn't bark for anything unless it's a stranger, cat or ghost. But this little girl was barking her head off at something in the street. I looked and it was nothing. She ran to the edge of the yard and really started growling and barking bad. She's a good dog cause she never left the yard.
gaping hole to China
mud in neighbors driveway and in front of my house
Then I saw it, water was bubbling up from the street, hardly noticeable until it started running down the street and into a neighbors driveway. So I called the city and told them they need to send someone pronto cause water was seeping from the street. I would have had pictures of the slackers doing nothing but my camera was in need of recharging. I did get these this morning at 09:30 am. Wonder what time they get to work? It's now 10:30. Oh wait!! A back ho pun intended just arrived. I do have to say they did fix the pipe last night before leaving the scene of the crime. At least we had that. But they left the hole as you see it in the pictures. No blinkers for night drivers. I was waiting to see if a drunk would drive right into it, but nothing happened, shit!
Right now a dozer is messing up the street big time. He is trying to get all the mud and stuff off the street but he's making a bigger mess. Ooops, they are changing drivers. Oh well.
What my fat fluffy ass is reading: Lots of shit happened yesterday, shit. Way to much for a place like this.
Anywho, I got The Help by Kathryn Stockett from Amazon.com in the mail. I started reading it as soon as I opened the package. It's a pretty good book. I understand that this is her first that she has written. She almost gets you into the story but she leaves a lot out so you are not entirely drawn into it. That's too bad cause the characters and the story are good.
The weather outside: It's HOT!!! FUCKING HOT!!! ALL FUCKING DAY LONG IT'S HOT!!! THERE IS NO RELIEF!! NOT EVEN IN THE SHADE!! ICED TEA DRIES UP IN THE FUCKING GLASS BEFORE YOU CAN DRINK IT. THE ICE CUBES ARE EVEN HOT!!
That's the weather report for the rest of the year. Thank you.
Before I start this review, I would like to thank Sarah at Ben Bella Books for giving me the chance to review a really great book . She has the patience of a saint. Thanks sooooo much Sarah.
Nyx In The House Of Night: Mythology, Folklore and Religion in the P.C. and Kristin Cast Vampyre Series is a collection of wonderful essays.
I always start by reading the introduction in the book. I have to painfully say that I haven't had the chance to read any of the books in the collection in the Nyx in The House of Night series yet. The introduction sold me into putting every one of the books on my Need To Read list.
P.C. Cast tells of how she researches her material for the books and characters. She says she has "revised mythology, created worlds based on history..." I'll say she has, and much more. She becomes editor of this collection of essays from various writers that bring their insights and unique thoughts into their writings.
There is an essay on Native Americans and the Cherokee Nation called The Magic of Being Cherokee by Jordan Dane. Very well written of the myths and legends of the Cherokee People and of the main character Zoey Redbird and her roots in the House of Night series.
I won't tell about all the stories in here because it would give away everything. But I will tell you that if you are an avid reader of Zoey's world and you want to know more, than check out this book. It is crammed with material you might want to know.
One example are the "Behind the House of Night Names" in the back of the book. It gives the characters name, then the Greek meaning, who they are in The House Of Night series, etc, etc. I think that this is the best feature if you need to know about someone in the books. The artwork by Allan Torrance is marvelous. Almost intuitive with the essays.
Yeah, I'm soggy. I went out to water the yard and the hose blew up on me, literally. I had to go to the other side of the house to get the other hose cause David took the keys to the "Chamber of Secrets" with him to work and I couldn't get the new hose.
I need to get a second set of keys to that shed. Either that or get my own shed with everything pink so he'll be ashamed to touch anything in it. Anywho, I was sopping wet but I finished the job. After this post I'm getting some sweet iced tea and plopping my fat fluffy ass in the chair out front and enjoying the morning.
It's so freaking hot: It's so hot lately that we've been losing our cable service which also means our computer server too. It really sucks. But in a way it's a good thing cause I can read or sit outside and drink in the greeness of the plants. It's so pretty but it's so fucking hot.
I found this cute video via my husband, David. That kinda shows you what they do at work in the office. But check this out. Who says dogs are stupid. This one knows it's too hot outside so he's bringing it in. I love it. http://www.wimp.com/swimoutside/
Shit I did recently: This past weekend I just relaxed cause David was on his fishing trip and he got home Sunday afternoon. Instead of going out for dinner I decided to make meatloaf. He loves that shit. I also made spaghetti. Strange, I know, but if I make it then put it away in the fridge and then have it for dinner two days later it's like WOW!!! It tastes fantastic. So that's how we have spaghetti in our house. I think it gives all the herbs a chance to enhance it.
Shit I need to get done: I need to put the finishing touches to a book review for Friday's post. I love this book, it's so cool. But you'll have to decide.
Adventures : Lately just to get out of the house I have been taking the puppies for car rides around the block. It just blows their little puppy minds that they get to go someplace. Yesterday I went to the bank to deposit some cash and I took them for the ride. They were in car ride heaven.
Lucy had her head head hanging out the window barking at everyone, Pebbles was riding shotgun with her head out the window, barely. She's such a little thing that I have to pick her up to get her into the car. Spunky had the other back window, slobbering all over the place. They got their bones from the bank teller and we went home. David had just gotten home for lunch and they were all over him. Probably trying to tell him about their adventure. Puppies are so easy to please.
On a hot, dusty day a cowboy rode into a small frontier town. After dismounting, he walked behind his horse, lifted it's tail and kissed it where the sun don't shine. An old man rocking by the general store witnessed the whole thing.
"Whudd'ya do that fer?" he asked.
"Got chapped lips," the cowboy replied.
The old man asked, "Does that help?"
The cowboy said, "Nope, but it keeps me from lickin' 'em
YES!! It's true! Judith over at Merlin's Magickal Mistress is giving away BLING! Yepper's it's cause she reached over 100, 111 admirers to be exact. So she is giving away four bling items but there will be only three winners. That means you can choose what you want. See below.
So I would advise you to go on over to her blog and check them out and enter today.
Hurry, act now! Quantities are limited! Operators are standing by. BWWAAAAHAHAhhahahahaaahahaaaaa! I just had to add that.
I was watching the early news report while I was fighting off a mother fucker of a migraine. They were talking about dieting and that when you diet the brain eats itself. Like EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWW!!!
It's bad enough that we have zombies to look out for, but our brains are into cannibalism?!!! Shit, shoot me in the fucking head now! I think this might explain why I'm so fucking crazy as a loon. All that dieting my whole stinking life is now showing itself. I wonder how much grey matter I have left. Did I give myself a lobotomy? Is this why I'm blogging? Do chickens have lips?
Since I moved to the middle of Texas out in the center of farm country here. I have taken up making my own shit. I don't bake much but when I start it's like I can't stop and the neighbors reap the benefits.
Since I now have some kick ass meds to keep my back pain in check, I have been doing a whole shit load of fartin around in the kitchen. I made my first peach cobbler from someone's recipe that David brought home. It was a sad thing to behold let me tell you. So when I improved the recipe and sent it back to the woman who gave it to David, I instantly became her enemy. Go figure, it was an old family recipe that tasted like crap and I made it better. David loved it after I changed it but he isn't gonna tell her cause he works with her.
She gave David a recipe for home made vanilla ice cream. It called for a cup of flour, 6 eggs, 3 cups of sugar, etc... David made it according to instructions and I was there to help him if he needed it. He followed everything to the letter. We waited 12 hours so it would harden nicely like it said. It tasted like vanilla ice cream with flour in it. It was pure crap.
David told her it was great. Best ice cream he ever made. When he got home he said let's drop the amount of flour and sugar down a bit. That was the nastiest ice cream he ever had he said. So I took it upon myself to rig up a great tasting ice cream from scratch all my own. I gave him a list of stuff to get me and plenty of rock salt and a couple of bags of ice.
It took me only two trys but I got it. I made 1 gallon of this stuff. David swears it tastes like store bought Blue Bell Homemade Vanilla ice cream. If you want to try it then check it out below.
Old Fashioned Homemade Vanilla Ice Cream
16 oz. carton of Heavy Whipping Cream
1 can Eagle Brand Sweetened Condensed Milk
1/4 cup vanilla
16 oz. Karo light syrup
1/2 gallon of milk
Place the heavy whipping cream in the freezer for 20 minutes to let it become freezing cold but not frozen. While that is freezing up a bit, set up your ice cream maker. I have an old one from the 70's so things will be quite different. You might need to play around with the recipe if your ice cream maker is small.
Pour the Eagle Brand milk into a medium large bowl. Whisk in the vanilla and Karo syrup and then the very cold heavy cream. Add a bit of the regular milk and whisk for one minute. Pour into the ice cream container and then add the rest of the milk all the way up to the 1 gallon mark. Add the paddle and set the ice cream maker according to the manufacturers instructions.
While the ice cream is churning you can clean up the mess and set up a covered container big enough for the ice cream to sit in the freezer. Pour the ice cream into the container and freeze. It should be ready in 8 to 12 hours.
Gruene is pronounced Green. It WAS a cute little town in the New Braunfels area about 10 yeas ago until all these fucking developers decided to build those fugly slap together in one day homes all over the damned place. I mean to tell you, it's fucking ugly and looks like a real tourist trap now.
But David wanted to go there for dinner, week before last on a Sunday to show my brother, sister in law and my niece some history of Texas. Fucking idiotic is what his idea was. Now don't get me wrong here. I'm all for showing my family what a beautiful place I live in but shit!!! Not in the middle of fucking hot summer where it's 2000 degrees Kelvin in the shade. Give me a freaking break here!
David wanted to show my family a great time with the history of Gruene and all the cool stuff about it. The Gristmill is where we ate. It used to be a cotton mill. You can go into the building while you are waiting to be called for dinner and see all the cool pictures of the old days when Gruene was first established.
Outside right next to the Gristmill is Gruene Hall. It's the oldest still standing and working dance hall in Texas. Many country stars have played there and still do. Check out the site links I have at the end of this blog post and check out the cool stuff. The Gruene Hall was also the place where the dance scene in Michael was filmed. You know where he was dancing with all the women in the place.
Anywho, we ended up having a somewhat good time eating hot food on a hot day and sweating like we were working out at a gym.
It could have been better if we had done what I wanted which was take them to San Marcos for dinner at Saltgrass. It's indoors and air conditioned and the windows are floor to ceiling so you can look out on the river below and watch the toobers [people in inner tubes float by]. They have the best food I have ever tasted dining out and the cheese cake is to die for. In fact there is an actual web site dedicated to finding out the recipe for it, which is top secret. So if anyone knows what I am talking about when I said Saltgrass cheesecake PLEASE, if you have the recipe or know of a friend of your friend of a niece of her sister-in-law of their grandma who has the recipe, please share it with me. It is the most sought after recipe in Texas. I hear some people will pay millions for it.