MY MINIONS

Halloween Begins

Thursday, July 30, 2015

She's Not The Normal One


Strange shit happens in this town almost every day. If not here at home it's out on the street. To give you an idea there was an escapee from the North side of town this morning. Yes!! There was!
Well, let me tell ya. David called me and said he was getting his morning taco and was driving to work when he saw a chicken in the middle of the street. It was sitting there like it owned it. David said that it was probably a fugitive from one of the poultry trucks that drive down the street on their way to Tyson Foods where they process chickens. I could just imagine the police trying to catch that flappy bird. Sometimes I wonder why we have no real newspaper in this town with all the weird shit that happens.
David always comes home for lunch. No matter what, unless he has a meeting that runs overtime, he always comes home at lunch. Yesterday David was downloading Windows 10 on his computer at lunchtime and then left for work. It was like forever downloading that shit. About 4 hours later I gave up and stopped the so-called download and turned his computer off.

When he came home he decided to try again and this time the stupid thing downloaded without a hitch. I have to say Windows 10 is nice. It's got nothing in the way of problems like David thought it would. I will be downloading 10 this weekend when I can tend to it without interruptions. So far so good Microsoft. Let's see how this goes in the coming weeks.
Pebbles aka Squirt
Also yesterday David made a very strange but funny remark that got me laughing so hard I nearly fell out of my office chair. You see Pebbles is a very tiny dog. She's the chihuahua that we rescued from a puppy farm about 7 years ago. She was very shy, skittish, and just plain scared of us. She had no contact with humans whatsoever except when they fed her and cleaned her cage. Poor baby.

Anywho, she has this thing about staring off into "The Zone" as I call it. It's quite strange to watch her because when you snap your fingers she turns her head v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y towards you. It's like watching a horror movie about to unfold. She's a scary little shit. Well, she was staring me down while I was working on some stuff at my desk. I could feel her stare like little needles hitting the side of my neck and told her that it wasn't time yet.

What she was doing was trying to get me to give them their evening bone treats early. I have them set for 6 p.m. every night after dinner. I give them their mini bone treats as a dessert. Well, she makes herself look really small while she sits next to me staring until I notice her. Sometimes I think Lucy puts her up to it.

David happened to notice the staring going on and alerted me. I didn't turn to look because I knew it was the Squirt. But David kept calling me to make me look. I told him I knew what was going on, but he insisted that it wasn't Lucy, it was Pebbles. But the way he said it made me laugh. He said, "No, it's not the normal one."

You see, to him, Lucy is the normal one of the 3 dogs we have. Well, I lost it right then and couldn't stop laughing. Pebbles just calmly sat there, the poor little thing, and watched her momma lose her mind. I really almost tipped my chair laughing so hard. So now she's referred to as "not the normal one." Poor baby has no fucking idea.



2 comments:

Birdie said...

I hope that chicken finds a forever home.

I will be downloading Windows 10 but I am afraid to. These new downloads usually screw everything up.

Pickleope said...

Can you please make a GIF of Pebbles turning her head oh-so-slowly after you snap? I'd love to see it. Also, from everything I hear from alarmists, chickens from giant chicken farms like Tyson are supposed to be man-made without beaks and hyper-enlarged Pamela Anderson-style breasts and wings like 80's Arnold Schwarzenegger (by the way, spelled his last name right on my first try which is terrifying). So that chicken could not possibly be from the Tyson farm.

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