MY MINIONS

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Warning! - This Blog May Contain:

violence, terrible grammar, gratuitous sex, strong odors, seed porn, and possibly improper French

Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Weird Animal Wednesday







Tuesday, May 30, 2017

It's Tuesday

Hey, everyone, I'm back. I hope all y'all had a great weekend because we certainly did. Friday was quiet. We just sat around and watched TV. I did laundry, cleaned house and repotted and watered some of my house plants.
One of 2 lemon plants and one of 3 pineapple cuttings
I found out that some lemon seeds I threw in one of my half wine barrel planters by the back gate to the courtyard are growing. Also, the three pineapple cuttings are taking root and doing well. The squirrels killed my newest young mango tree and Davids watermelon and his honeydew melon plants. The little fuzzy bastards ate the plants before they could even sprout flowers. David is pissed. I told him over and over again let's build a greenhouse so we can keep the critters out. So it's not my fault. I tried to tell him.
Luling City Market BBQ
On Saturday we drove over to Luling and met David's daughter, Anna for a BBQ lunch at City Market. Her birthday is next week and we weren't sure if she would be able to drive down from Austin to see us. Anywho, I was hoping her new boyfriend would be with her so I could finally meet him but not this time. It's a working weekend for him. He works for the Lt. Governor of Texas. Anna took some BBQ goodies from City Market back with her so he could enjoy what he missed.  
Polaris Slingshot - Megatron. Awesome 3-wheeler.
Notice no registration sticker or license plates.
 It's not street legal to drive one in Texas
We did have a pretty good time in Luling. For some reason, everything was right with the world. I took three of my pain med pills and was pain-free by the time we arrived in Luling. We found prime parking under a tree, and we saw a Polaris Slingshot which I got pictures of in case there are any car/motorcycle enthusiasts out there in blogger-land. The Slingshot is not a street legal vehicle here in Texas. So it's very rare indeed to see one.
The owner is the black gentleman in the black T-shirt talking
to the gentleman in the motorcycle helmet
There are obvious reasons why it's not street legal. No roll bar, no side panels, and no air bags. It can't be labeled a motorcycle because there is no saddle or a car because it's missing the safety items I listed. So it can't be registered at the DMV. It's a sweet three-wheeler, great for weekend jaunts around town if you like asphalt surfing and hiding from the cops. The cost of this rascal is about $20 grand.
Pebbles in her better days
David was thinking of going down to the coast on Monday but I talked him out of it. It would be too crowded at the beach and besides, it's supposed to rain. I just wanted to have a nice quiet weekend. The weekdays are busy enough and I like my quiet time. Something bad did happen on Monday though. Pebbles, our baby girl that we rescued from a puppy farm, the one with diabetes has gone completely blind and deaf now. Even though I have tried to keep her as healthy as possible, her age is getting the best of her. She is having trouble walking and she sleeps 95% of the day. David is talking about taking her to the vet this week and having her "put down." I can't. Even though it would be best for her, I just can't get it into my mind to do that. Ending a beloved pet's life is so hard for me. I'm having a hard time with that idea. He may have to do this alone.


Sunday, May 28, 2017

Memorial Day



Religion in a Nutshell


Friday, May 26, 2017

Friday Funny

A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters.
The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while “the lights would turn off.”
Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers.
However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent.
She walked up to the bartender, and asked, “May I please use the restroom?”
The bartender replied, “OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf.”
“Well, in that case, I’ll just look the other way,” said the nun.
So the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant.
After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause.
She went to the bartender and said, “Sir, I don’t understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?”
“Well, now they know you’re one of us,” said the bartender. “Would you like a drink?”
“No thank you, but, I still don’t understand,” said the puzzled nun.
“You see,” laughed the bartender, “every time someone lifts the fig leaf on that statue, the lights go out.”

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

Two Baby Birds Now

I just got back from the doctor's office and decided to check on the eggs. So far two babies have hatched. David said only one but when I used a flashlight to see into the hole where the nest is I saw two hatchlings. There is one in the center and one to the bottom left. I think there is another hatching because when the center baby moved I could see a beak poking out of one of the eggs. I couldn't get a picture because the center baby moved back over it. Ugly little bitches aren't they?
Yes Birdie, there is a baby shower. I have registered at Neiman Marcus and Saks Fifth Ave. The party is this Saturday @ 6:00 PM Central, so go get my bling y'all.


Tuesday, May 23, 2017

Baby bird

One baby bird hatched so far. David looked in the nest for me and said it had it's mouth open like it was ready for food. I will try to get pictures tomorrow if I feel better.

Monday, May 22, 2017

Time out

I'm going to be taking the week off. Hopefully, I'll feel better when I get back.

Sunday, May 21, 2017

Religion in a Nutshell


Thursday, May 18, 2017

Follow Up From Monday

Monday I said we have a teeny tiny birds nest in one of my hanging baskets, of all places. This is a predicament because it makes it quite hard to water the flowers without trying to get the nest wet too. So I have had to water with a little plastic cup, a little at a time so the nest stays dry and mama bird doesn't bitch at me so much. I also got the chance to take pictures of the nest and the eggs. Which made her furious.
You can see some of the little eggs in the nest. Notice how small the nest is in proportion to the petunia stems near its entrance. This sucker is tiny as hell. David was amazed that such a little bird could fart out five eggs like that.


It's not a very clear picture because I was using a telephoto lens on my little phone camera and it's not that great, but as you can see there are five tiny white eggs with brown spots. They are no bigger than my pinky finger nail. Don't worry I do know better than to touch anything in or around the nest. If she even caught the odor of human on her eggs she would fly off and start another nest somewhere else. I really want her to hatch these little guys and take more pictures as things progress.
Note: I found out that the House Sparrow lays 1-5 eggs and the eggs will hatch in approximately 11 days. Sooooooooo, between Tuesday to Thursday the eggs should hatch and I'll try to get pictures.

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Wet Cat Wednesday









Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Cutest Ever

Napoleon the puppy wants desperately to ride in foster mommy's lap  and cuddle while she's driving but she says no, so he throws a world class hissy fit just like a child. I love the way he whines and sticks his tongue out at the same time. Such a big baby but this is the cutest ever.

Monday, May 15, 2017

It's Monday

Very quiet weekend but it was a busy one. Let's see . . . I cleaned house, washed windows, fell, found a bird's nest in one of my hanging baskets on the front porch, and I finally, YES, finally got David to finish filling that stupid sinkhole on the side of the house. Like I said it was a busy weekend. So today I'm just going to throw a heating pad on my shoulder off and on with ice. 

So, I wasn't sure but I kept seeing this sparrow hanging out on the chains that hold one of my hanging baskets. I thought it was strange at first then I noticed she was carrying bits of grass clippings and tiny pieces of twigs. So when I had to water the planters I decided to take a peek. Sure enough, there was a teeny tiny nest, no bigger than the palm of my hand. In fact, it was smaller than that. The mama bird had dug a small hole into the soil and lined it with the grass and built up around it with the twigs. There are five little spotted white and brown eggs in it no bigger than the tip of my pinky finger. I've been watching the area for cats and I'm helping to keep the birds safe. When she goes off to eat the male comes and sits on the eggs in her place. She bitches like a chittering sound when she comes back so he can leave the nest and she takes over. I'm hoping to get pictures of the hatchlings as soon as I can. So stay tuned.
Ah yes, I fell. It happened in the kitchen yesterday. David mopped the kitchen floor and then went outside to empty the garbage. He neglected to tell me the floor was wet and I slipped and fell on my left side but the real damage was done to my left shoulder. I banged the fuck out of it against the side of the kitchen counter when I went down and then again when I hit the floor. I must have passed out from the pain because next thing I know I'm waking up to Lucy and David's worried faces. I couldn't get up because the left arm and shoulder hurts like a bitch and the left side of my ass is hurting as well, so that means my legs aren't going to be of any help in this situation. So I'm half sitting half lying on the floor in the kitchen, massaging my shoulder that is now pulsing with pain. 
Lucy keeping an eye on my clumsy ass.
David is asking me if I can get up. I say yes but I need time because I don't want to pass out again. Lucy has a paw on my knee like she's asking me if I'm okay, with a worried look. When I finally got up off the floor, I took some Tylenol and grabbed an ice pack and went to sit for a while in the recliner. Lucy followed me like a shadow, got up on the recliner with me and watched me the whole time. In fact, she never left me alone for the rest of the day. 








Sunday, May 14, 2017

Religion in a Nutshell


Friday, May 12, 2017

Short Note

I was gone most of the day yesterday. Wednesday night I broke a tooth and I had the dentist pull it Thursday morning. Thank goodness for walk-in appointments. After all the fun of getting stabbed with a needle full of novocaine, I spent the day in bed sleeping it off. That shit makes me drowsy. Haveing a tooth pulled is bad for an elderly person like me. It's not like it used to be when I had all my wisdom teeth pulled. I was able to do straight to work the same night at the hospital with no problems. Now I bleed like a stuck pig And the novoshit makes me want to sleep forever. I do have to say I had my Nurse Lucy and Doctor Spunky watching over me. They both slept all day on the bed with me


Thursday, May 11, 2017

Canada Eh?


Wednesday, May 10, 2017

Wet Dog Wednesday









Tuesday, May 9, 2017

Cutest Ever

Both Callie and the baby are 3 months old at the taking of this video. Callie looks as though she is trying to stay awake and guard the baby. This video was posted March of 2012. So sweet!

Monday, May 8, 2017

It's Monday

Awesome weekend! My pain level was down from an 8 to a 2. It felt great to move around and do things that needed to be done. I had a butt load of house work and laundry to be done. David actually helped. On Sunday he let me sleep late. When I woke up all I had to do was my exercises and then read. It was very quiet Sunday. 
I really don't understand this. When I was working, the laundry wasn't as bad. Between the two of us we had a weekly three loads of laundry. Now with me being disabled we have more like five loads of laundry. I can't explain it except that I'm not wearing my scrubs all the time. That alone was one load. I didn't want to contaminate anything so I would wash those last and use an antiseptic. But it was white clothes, David's clothes, and then my scrubs. It could be that we had a larger load capacity washer too. He got a smaller capacity washer when the big one died and spilled it's guts all over the laundry floor one morning. So now I'm having to break down the large loads into smaller ones.
Lucy getting her massage
It's a boring day today. I gave the puppies a massage and now they're all passed out. It's amazing how they flock to me when I start on the youngest and move up to the oldest. Lucy keeps weaseling her way in between me and Pebbles. She always wants to go first and she wants to be worked on the longest. Little attention whore. She's sleeping next to me on e the couch. She loves her mommy.

Sunday, May 7, 2017

Religion in a Nutshell



Friday, May 5, 2017

Friday Funny


Thursday, May 4, 2017

Canada Eh?


Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Wet Cat Wednesday










Tuesday, May 2, 2017

Cutest Ever

This is going to be one of the new items I will be featuring on Tuesdays. I will be showing the cutest ever animal and children videos from Youtube.com.

This is the first one, a little dormouse that was found in hibernation or "tapor" when the weather is cold and wet and food is very scarce. They will curl up into a little ball and sleep until the weather is warm again.  This little guy was found snoring in a nesting box that conservationists left out. Dormice usually don't snore like this, hey make a little high pitched peeping noise. The person handling him is a licensened conservationist.  This video was uploaded Dec. 21 2011.
This work 'Snoring Dormouse with sound - listen' is an adaption of 'SurreyWT: Snoring Dormouse' originally made available with a Creative Commons Attribution license (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/b...) by the Surrey Wildlife Trust http://bit.ly/wP4Fak

Monday, May 1, 2017

Fuck! It's Monday!


The weekend was beautiful. We had a little thunderstorm that rushed through with a cold front that is keeping our mornings in the 50's. It was quite uncomfortable for my back but I managed through it. Sunday I got David to finally help me with the roses but I ended up doing most of the pruning because he doesn't like doing it. So while I did the pruning in the front yard, he cleaned up the courtyard and got rid of all the dead leaves and he sprayed some newly built wasp nests. Right now the sun is streaming through pecan trees in the front yard and it's so green and beautiful outside.
Something I've noticed about our dogs that remind me of children. First off if you've had or still have children around the house you will sometimes have one that it unruly and he/she will defy you at all cost. Or they will talk back under their breath. Well, I have that problem. It's with my oldest dog Spunky. He defies me every time. It's like dealing with a bad child. I don't spank them and they know mommy means business when she says something because they pay the price. Either I take their toys away for a day or withhold their afternoon and evening treats. So I usually have no problem with the puppies. But Spunky is becoming a problem child.
Spunky at 7 yrs old
Yesterday I asked David to stop Spunky from barking. Spunky was outside, note* this dog is old and blind as a bat and defies me every time, barking at absolutely nothing. He was barking because of sounds in the neighborhood. So I asked David to hush him up. David was unsuccessful because Spunky and David are buddies. They are the only men in the house so they stick together. Spunky is still barking so I tell David to be firm with him and tell him to stop the barking. No luck. Finally, David yells at Spunk to shut-up and that does the trick, so I thought.
I'm walking from the living room to the TV room where David is  watching TV and I see Spunky on the back porch with his back to the glass door barking under his breath, almost whispering, "burff burff." I quickly called David to come witness this and we both started laughing. I said to David, "now do you believe me?"
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