Day 1 Of My Incarceration

Today is Monday. Yes, yes it is and this is officially my first real day of incarceration. Yes, David starts his July 4th vacation today.  This means I have to come running when he wants to show me something on the web. Yeah, he's like me. Don't get me wrong here. We both love to web surf the web like crazy, but his surfing is interrupted with bouts of Jerry Springer and Maury.

I don't mind the fact that he watches this crap, but he tends to play it LOUD. So loud that I have trouble concentrating. Even with my earphones on I can hear that shit. So just like last time, I'm taking up refuge in the living room away from the noise. But I will have company because the puppies follow mommy everywhere.

Anywho, I had him take down the broken bird feeder from the pecan tree Saturday. He also cut the pecan tree branches from the power line to the house. Today, he has an appointment with the CT machine for his left kidney. I'm hoping there is nothing wrong but you never know. Other than that David is going to be maxin and relaxin all week long unless he goes to Home Desperate to drool.

Sunday evening, I made a dump cake for dessert. Yes, I know, I know. I fucking love to bake. But last night I was tired. So, I dumped blueberry pie filling and 2 cups of fresh blueberries. Then I dumped the yellow cake mix, dry, from the box over the berries and topped the dry cake mix with thin sliced pats of butter. Throw the whole thing into a 350-degree oven for 50 minutes, or until the butter is melted into the dry mix and created a cookie topping that is lightly browned.

Well, while we were watching "Gone Girl" on HBO Demand, The fucking fire alarm went off. That fucker is loud. The puppies came running from the kitchen. and they were shaking their heads because of the loud screaming of the alarm. It was very offensive to their ears.

There wasn't a single thing on fire. Not even a billowing of smoke. It was the heat in the room next to the kitchen that had the alarm going off. It was just too fucking hot in there, so we turned the window AC on to cool off the room. I never heard the end of that episode either. David kept saying I had conjured up the fires of Hell to bake that fucking dump cake.

I think I'm going to have to look for a grave site, buy some duct tape, and find his shovel out in his shed. I have the tarp, so I'm just about set. David might have a very short vacation.

Come To The Dark Side, I Have Cookies

I was very busy this past weekend. Found my "Soft and Chewy Cookie" recipes, FINALLY. It took me three days to find the little fuckers under all my loose recipes pile. One day I really need to get that shit in order and copy them into my recipe book.

Anywho, I forgot that my plastic measuring cups that David bought a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away had been broken. Yeppers, them handles on them cheap ass plastic buggers just broke right off. And I was measuring flour for bread when it happened.

Well I asked David to pick me up some new measuring cups. Preferably ones that were metal. He got me these stainless steel, heavy metal, Judas Priest mutherfuckers. It would take ten million tons of pressure or my sister B, sitting on em to crush them. Aren't they pretty? Well I think they are.

Well I started making cookie dough Saturday morning around 9:30 and didn't finish until almost 2 that afternoon. You see I have a limited number of mixing bowls and had to let the dough sit in the refrigerator to set for 30 minutes each time. I made only 2 different cookie doughs but the recipes were doubled. So by the time I finished rolling the dough into logs for freezing, I was like FUCK THIS SHIT!!  I got a total of 6 logs. One peanut butter and 5 oatmeal raisin, chocolate chip.

On Sunday I washed laundry, changed linens, cleaned and dusted. Then I baked the log of peanut butter and a log of the oatmeal raisin. I'm saving the rest of the frozen dough for Thanksgiving. 

Anywho, I baked 3 dozen cookies. The puppies love the peanut butter. Spoiled brats! I was able to get a bunch of shit done this past weekend. So fucking proud that I didn't have too much back pain. Not suffering with it this morning either. I love my meds when they work well. 

We are expecting rain for the next 3 days. It's a Gloomy Gus of a day today but I love this weather. Especially when it's cool and gloomy. I have errands to run and other shit to do and I'll be reading a few blogs and Facebook fights later when I get back. Hope your day goes well.