MY MINIONS

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Warning! - This Blog May Contain:

violence, terrible grammar, gratuitous sex, strong odors, seed porn, and possibly improper French

Monday, April 11, 2011

The Crazy Witch's Daybook

My mood is My Unkymood Punkymood (Unkymoods) again.

What my fat ass is doing today... absofuckinlutely nothing. I am a lazy bitch today and ain't nothing going to get me off this couch unless it catches fire. Then I'll think about it.

What I'm thankful for... the lurkers that lurk in the shadows. But hey, they read this crazy shit, so what. I am really thankful for all my blogging bitch buddies.When I was able to get on the internet to read some of your stuff, you entertained the shit out of me and believe me I needed it. Thank you.

One of my guilty pleasures is finding David's stash of Samoas and Thin Mint Girl Scout cookies wrapped in his fishing clothes while I was cleaning yesterday. MMMmm samoas ... smack slobber drool drool.


The latest addition to my Shit List is the bitch across the street. She has no husband so she borrows everyone  else's to do her yard work for her. What makes me sick is once one of the guys gets tired of her begging for help she goes and borrows someone else. She saw David out one day last week tilling the front yard up for new grass and she runs over to ask him to please do her yard too when he can. David was too nice to say no. Yeah, well I'm all set to tell the bitch straight up to stop bothering David. I've seen the way she works. It's amazing the guys around here don't tell her to fuck off. But then they're all nice guys too.

What I am hearing right now... nothing except smacking noises from me eating samoas. aahahahahhahahahaa Oh, he's gonna kill me this time.

4 comments:

  1. I needed a good laugh and I knew right where to come to get it. I can't even pick my favorite part because everything is fucking hilarious. Although the picture of nothing is genious.

    Glad to hear you're back to your sarcastic snarky self.

    Your BIB
    DM

    ReplyDelete
  2. *Drool* Samoas and Thin Mints .... this year I discovered a new thing to live for, Shamrock Shakes with crumbled up Thin Mints over top. You're welcome.
    WTH with those women? We had some bitch across the street from us walk over during a snowstorm and asked the Mister to dig her car out because she "had some place to be". Well then, your ass should have been out an hour ago to start digging!

    ReplyDelete
  3. i never heard about samoas,but they sure looks yummi! :-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. i like the peanut butter patties. But for some reason this year they taste different. I heard they changed companies. so i don't think they are as good.

    ReplyDelete

let 'er rip

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