MY MINIONS

Halloween Begins

Tuesday, January 30, 2018

Finding a New Mug and the Puppies

I've been busy looking for a new coffee/tea mug that is over-sized, preferably in the 34 oz. range or roughly 100ml. You see my old "Not now Satan!" cup that I bought like 15 years ago was dropped and broken over the weekend and now I'm going crazy trying to find a replacement. There was one that I liked but it's only 11 oz. That's not exactly the capacity that I like for my tea or coffee.
I did see this, but that is much too large.
But I have so many things that I want as my own logo but I narrowed it down to two, either:

"Not Now Satan" 
or
"Don't Touch Me Peasant"

The only problem is that most of the personalized mugs are small 11oz. or you have to order a minimum of 50 mugs. That sucks. I guess I'm screwed until I find a big mug.
Lucy watching for squirrels
Lucy has been keeping a watchful eye on the squirrels. If it's too cold to go outside she lays on the cushions on the couch and watches out the living room window next to me. sometimes I hear her snore because she fell asleep on the job. But she has made it her job to protect the house. When she's not doing that, she teases Spunky by jumping on him and running away. The little guy can't chase her because he can't see her or hear her. She's so mean.
Spunky in his younger days
Spunky is now blind and deaf and has turned into a Roomba. The poor little old man bumps into a wall and then turns around and bumps into a door. He bumps and turns, bumps and turns until he gets where he wants to be. Saturday David got goosebumps when he heard Spunky call for me from in the kitchen. David said he distinctly heard Spunky say "mom." I said that Spunky always calls for me when he gets frustrated and needs my help. I just guide him to the TV room where he likes to be and he's fine. I can tell you one thing though, he can sniff out food really well and he finds his way to it. I was making a meatloaf with baked potato, carrot and zucchini slices as a side on Sunday and he bumped his way into the kitchen in record time. He stayed there until I gave him a cooled potato slice. He's such a good boy. He's getting so old and it will be a sad day when we lose him.




Sunday, January 28, 2018

Monday - Commercials Edition

I was looking for a funny commercial in Youtube yesterday morning that David described about the Barkley family for Subaru and a car wash with bull dogs washing the car. It was funny, but then I looked on the right side on the up coming videos and found this commercial from New Zealand about Toyota. This is way better than the Barkleys. Ya gotta feel for this cat for trying.


The Mercedes Commercial...


Then there's this Vodka Commercial...














Religion in a Nutshell


Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Partner in Crime

Yesterday, I openly advertised for a Partner in Crime. Well, of all pickled people, Pickleope von Pickleope asked me why I didn't consult internally before posting the position openly to the masses and what did the job pay. Well, my pickled friend, to start with you do qualify PARTIALLY for the first and second requirements. Although I have never seen any nudity or adult language on your blog. Other requirements are:

  • You will not be paid unless we score big. Then the normal 30% will be paid to you when any merchandise is fenced.
  • You must have a sizable "bail money" savings account readily available because if we are caught, I will not bail your ass out of jail no matter how close a friend you may be. 
  • You must be available day or night at a moments notice to go on a "field trip" for no known reason. No children (or in your case, Pickleope, no gherkins) allowed
  • You must have your own tools for scaling tall buildings, cutting holes in fences and ceilings and above all, you must have your own dynamite.
  • You must buy your own ray gun. No capes allowed. Only I can wear the cape.
  • You must be able to withstand a horrible mangled burning death without warning.
  • You must speak French badly at all times. No, sorry those last three are my Minion requirements.
Any questions? Anyone? Anyone? 


Monday, January 22, 2018

Monday, I Told You To Fuck Off


Over the weekend Anne Marie used blackmail asked all her readers to check out her blogroll and go visit some of the other blogs she had listed. For all those who have visited mine, my deepest condolences. I'm really sorry that you have to be put through this form of torture. Really, I am. It's bad enough I make everyone else read or look at my blog but to have you, poor newbies . . . it's just awful. On the plus side, I'm currently taking applications for Partner in Crime. 
The weather is finally turning nice again. We seem to be having an on again off again winter/spring fight going on. Yes, Mommy Nature is off her meds and she's having hot flashes. I wish she would get her shit together and decide which season she wants. It's making people irritable.

Last week Thursday I fucked up. Instead of posting the Canada post I posted Friday's Hockey post and vice verse. I think it was because I was in a hurry to get things done on my blog and get back to the really fun stuff like cleaning house. So, I apologize if it fucked all y'all's end of the week. I was just so busy trying to clean before I ran out of energy and a pain-free moment. I was able to clean four ceiling fans, wash, dry and fold three loads of laundry, vacuum two big rooms and clean the bathroom before I died. Yeah, if you're like me I bet you were singing," and a partridge in a pear tree" at the end of all that shit. I know I was. Right now I'm hoping for another energy fart so I can clean the media (TV/computer) room, the laundry/pantry room and re-pot my baby lemon trees, my variegated ficus and pot up my spider plantlings.
David has been taking my car to work lately because it was cold. In reality, I think he likes driving it because he can play all his CD's on the way to work. I found that out when I had to drive to HEB to get oyster sauce for the eggrolls I was going to make for dinner. He had changed all the CDs to his shit. I couldn't find my music. All my Pink Floyd CDs were gone. I did finally find them. They were in the jewel cases for his CDs, inside the center console. So I changed all my CDs back from his. I think this is how wars begin. Some country changes over all the host country's shit to their own shit that the host country hates and then the host country changes it all back to their shit. The visiting country repeats the changeover and then the host country gets pissed and hides the keys. That pisses off the visiting country to no end and then they nuke each other, or something similar to rock, paper, scissors. Well, he now owes me a car detailing.



Tuesday, January 16, 2018

It's Freezing Rain



Sorry about not posting yesterday but there was a vicious cold front making its way into Texas and it was making my life hell. This morning David is stuck home with me because we have freezing rain and wind and it's making driving treacherous. I-10 is shut down because of ice.
There are cars and pickups all over the place. There's a line of truckers you would not believe stuck on I-10. The reason? San Antonio loves to build overpasses over everything which means everytime we get freezing rain, it's like an ice rink.
Yeah, there's that. Another thing is that San Antonio loses power at the snap of a finger. Yeah, they have outages everywhere. So that means no school today and no work today. It will be in the 20's all day with wind and then we have more freezing rain coming in from the northwest. It will be in the teens tonight so I'm guessing David will be home tomorrow too because the roads will be worse. As for me? I'm going back to bed.
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