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Thursday, January 31, 2019

Thursday, The Other Ugly Weekday Sister

Well, I might be returning the comments back to normal again very soon. I got rid of several unwanted spammers and they are no longer in business. I was getting spammed several times a day by these people. I reported them and that is that, for now. I will leave the comments on moderation for another week or so to make sure. 
I really can say the oil is working out fine. I found out you have to take it a while so it will build up in your system to get it to do what it is supposed to do. So far so good. I'm sleeping through the night at 8 to 10 hours. That's pretty damned great. It seems to be solving my migraine problems too. No more migraines since I've started using the CBD oil. The taste is still nasty and I found that if I take the oil before dinner on an empty stomach, it works much better for the night. I found out that having most of my pain gone seems to give me at least 10 to 15 minutes before my back gives out and I have to stop and put the heating pad on it. Then I'm good to go for a while more. Today I cleaned out the pantry and fixed a shelf that was about to fall down on one side. I also had to lug the garbage from the kitchen to the outside cans. I was able to dust mop the hallway, living room and dining room. Tomorrow I start the laundry and will wash what I feel I can. We are supposed to have rain for the next few days off and on and maybe into next week. That usually means pain in my joints. I will have to pay close attention to see if the CBD oil puts a stop to that.
I've noticed David isn't doing as much as he used to do around the house. Either he's Netflixed or just getting lazy. I think it's both. I asked him two days ago to take the trash out. It was still there. This weekend if the weather isn't too bad I'm going to make him get onto the roof to clean it off from leaves and clean out the gutters. He hasn't done anything on the weekends since Anna gave me the Roku for Christmas last year. Now all he wants to do is watch Netflix. I'm going to disconnect the Roku tomorrow night after he goes to bed and hide it. Hopefully, I'll get him to work for his Netflix fetish.






Tuesday, January 29, 2019

Acreage Holdings Cannabis Ad Rejected by CBS

The one commercial that CBS will not air during the super bowl this coming weekend. Why not? Because people who tell the truth about a plant that could save lives and put Big Pharma and booze companies out of business. That's why.

Monday, January 28, 2019

It's Monday and She's a Slut

I'm sitting on the sofa drinking my coffee with Lucy, who is sleeping under her blanket. She's very close to my leg so that if I get up she will too. I made coffee when I woke up and while I was waiting, I gathered up all the empty candle jars that have been collecting around the house. I decided to boil water too. I'm poured the boiling water into the nearly empty jars to loosen the wax and then I'll clean them up and use them for herb jars. They are perfect for an herb jar collection. Right now I keep my fresh herbs in plastic ziplock baggies. Storing them in the clean repurposed candle jars is perfect. I'll be able to put all my fresh herbs from my garden in them and not have to buy any over the winter like I do now. So much goes to waste because we don't have a winter greenhouse yet for my herbs, peppers, and veggies. We wouldn't have to buy so much if we had one. Well, that's my excuse for a winter greenhouse that I keep telling David to build. **deep sigh** 
I had an appointment with my pain doctor's Nurse Practitioner on Friday last week. I really like her. She's working well with me and helping me out. During the time we were talking a front was on its way through the area and I was feeling quite bad. I only took 4 drops of my CBD oil and it wasn't cutting my pain. I should have taken at least 10 drops. She was able to see what I go through. She was so sympathetic, so nice. She noticed I wasn't taking anything for my pain and I told her about the CBD oil that I had been using. I told her the dosage and how much I was actually using which is 10 drops in the morning and 10 before bedtime. I said this seems to be working. I also told her the side effects both minor and major that comes with it. I called them party favors. One that I didn't think would be so bad but was, was the stomach cramping. It hurts really bad like you have to crap constantly but you don't and some of the cramps feel like your intestines are going to rip open. I know that's something nasty to talk about but if someone wants to try this shit then you have to read up on it and be aware of the side effects. My NP didn't order a prescription of my usual hydrocodone, instead said if the oil doesn't work out to give her a call and she will call in a prescription for me on the spot. 
The great thing is that I don't feel those stomach pains anymore. The second great thing is with the 10 drops a day dosage, it's starting to work. I read that this has to build in the system for it to work properly. The oil also works faster if you take it on an empty stomach. I'm getting used to the icky taste too. I'm still looking for other dealers who are reputable and offer Hemp oil not CBD with THC in it. There are so many out there trying to make a fast buck with inferior products. David is setting up a "care package" with the nurse at work. She has a CBD Hemp Oil dealer that will work with her so if this works out, then we might be expecting Hemp oil, topical creams etc in the mail soon. Her dealer doesn't normally do this but is willing because I am trying different avenues of Hemp oil.
Over the weekend I noticed I was able to do more than I usually do. Gardening, cleaning house, laundry, and one of the hardest things was giving the puppies a bath. I accomplished all of these over the weekend. David wasn't happy this past weekend because I was on his ass about yard work like I used to do. Today I have nothing to do. I'm bored. I don't even feel the cold front approaching like I naturally would. It will be hitting us around 8pm tonight. Usually, I'm writhing in pain in bed by now but it's as if I hardly notice it at all. It's pretty nice. I do know that tonight I will have to take a couple of Tylenol to stop the worst of the arthritis pain tonight before 7pm but that's about it. 
Lucy looks like a baby seal when she's scared.
Also over the weekend, Lucy noticed that I was doing quite a lot too. She is such a worry wart. But hey, her job as my nurse is over. David kept asking her why she was looking so scared and shaking all the time and why she was following me so closely. Well, it was because mommy didn't normally do all the shit she was doing. Lucy was scared shitless. She was worried I would pass out from my pain if I had any. It felt great doing some of the things around here I used to do without worry. I did have to still sit down with the heating pad because I'm not 100% yet. Personally, I never will be but it sure feels nice to do stuff again.

Thursday, January 24, 2019

Relief in a Bottle . . . We Will See

Okay, the CBD oil came in the mail Tuesday afternoon. Right on time too because there was another cold front scheduled to hit Tuesday night. I opened the package and checked for anything like a reasonably large enough print that someone without superhuman eyesight could read on the bottle. You would think that a company would print up a small piece of paper with reasonably normal sized print on how to use the product, like dosage and how to store it. I mean is it so hard for them to think about something like that? Stupid motherfuckers.
Anywho I had to guess how to dose myself. I started with 4 drops under the tongue, which tasted like I was chewing old grass from under my lawnmower. It was nasty and made me sick to my stomach. After that, I ate a half peanut butter and jam sandwich and went to sit down on the sofa with Lucy. It took about 3 minutes and then I noticed my pain in my back was subsiding rather quickly. It took another 2 minutes and it was almost all gone. So was the pain in my arms and neck. I got up and walked around for a bit and it was amazing. My pain was still there but it was like there was a shield up between it and my body. So I decided to try something. I didn't want to do anything too big yet so I made brownies. Just standing for 10 minutes would be a milestone for me.  I was able to stand 15 minutes without to much pain.  I decided to try baking something else, so I made some blondies too. Holy Fucking Shit!! I was in the kitchen for a whole hour, standing without debilitating pain. Well, it wasn't exactly pain-free because I could still feel some form of an ache but I can say that my legs didn't buckle under me.
I was a bit hesitant in going any further but I wanted to see just how far I could take this so I swept the kitchen floor then I mopped it.  I was a bit fatigued but I was able to do things that I have been wanting to do for days.
My pain didn't completely return until around right after dinner at 6:30pm. I estimate the 4 drops under my tongue lasted from somewhere around 2 to 6:30pm. That's roughly 4 1/2 hours of being nearly pain-free. I finally found a magnifying glass and found out that the dosage on the bottle is 20 drops. WTF!! The bottle would be gone in a couple of weeks.
Tuesday night was going to be my true test. Usually, right when a weather front is about to run through our area I feel it with such intensity, it's like being torn apart. It hurts to the point of nearly wanting to scream. So, when I say something is going to be a test it literally is.
Right before my shower, I took 10 drops and ate a saltine to stop the nausea feeling that I had the first time I tried the oil. I dripped 10 drops of the oil into a teaspoon and then into my mouth. Nasty taste. I took my shower and then took my regular bedtime meds which I really have to take for other reasons. I fell asleep at 9pm and woke up at around 10:30 in pain. The front was coming through. The 10 drops of oil didn't really cut it so I went to the kitchen and took 10 more drops of the oil. I waited and waited nothing was working. Finally a little after 11pm I started to get relief. By then the front had passed. I finally got back to sleep and slept except for Lucy waking me up so she could go pee outside. I slept almost 6 hours. But I'm guessing the oil was the only thing that helped me sleep. My pain somewhat disappeared after an hour.
Okay, so, yesterday, Wednesday I woke up and it took a while for me to realize my surroundings. Really, it did. I woke up in a fuzzy haze. My body felt like I weighed 600 lbs. It took a bit of energy that I didn't have just to get out of bed. I had no idea why I was feeling like this. If you have ever gone to bed drunk and woke up in a hungover stupor then you know what I'm talking about. I finally returned to normal, changed clothes and went to the kitchen to get breakfast. I decided I'd go for 10 drops and I was able to clean house and do 3 loads of laundry before I gave out. My pain was still there all the time, just not as intense as it usually is. It was masked by the CBD oil. The beast took hold of my body around 4 hours later. I sat with my heating pad for an hour and took 5 more drops during that time to get me through the evening of making dinner, cleaning up and surviving through to near bedtime at 9pm. I took 10 drops half an hour before bedtime. I slept through the night with minimal discomfort. I said minimal because the aches were still there.
This morning I woke up all hungover again and my pain was once again at a 6 to 8 level. I don't have to do much today except mending a few things in my sewing basket and clean up a little here and there due to David. Other than that, I won't be using the CBD oil until I need it and then dose myself before bedtime.
I will say this, now that I think back on Tuesday, it must have been a "wow factor" that made me feel pretty good after trying the first few drops of the oil. It's sort of like the placebo effect where you are hoping for something so badly to cure your pain that you make it work in your mind. It took a moment to realize this. But for anyone who is seeking pain relief with CBD, there are different levels and kinds of pain. Mine is usually a range of 6 to mostly a 9 on any given day and it's arthritis but mostly nerve pain from my MCTD. This also means that the weather and whatever I do during the day like heavy to light housework is a factor of my pain.
But let me get back to my point. This CBD oil is not for everyone. It works differently with different people and different types of pain. For me, it made my pain feel like it was a caged vicious animal waiting to get at me. I could still feel it but it was like behind a glass partition. The CBD oil brought my pain which was on the scale of 8 or 9 down to a 3 or 4. It made things manageable. I could do only certain things due to trial and error. I still get fatigued from the MCTD, so this oil doesn't work for everything. I can't say what it will do for someone else. You will have to go by trial and error. See what works for you if you want to try this.
In the meantime, I will be trying other brands of CBD oils, food items, and also topical creams. This will not include vaping. I will be keeping a record of my pain scale and CBD usage for the next six months to a year if necessary.  I want to see how this works for me long term. So - we will see.

**After Note: For anyone that wants more info, check out this website. 
I have found a wealth of information on this site. So check it out.

Tuesday, January 22, 2019

I'm Out

Sorry, everyone. I'm still in so fucking much pain. This past weekend was unbelievably one of my worst in a while. The sad truth is that it is carrying over a few extra days just for good measure. It's taking me forever to type this. So I'm going to cut this short right now. So y'all take care and have a magical day.

Saturday, January 19, 2019

Quick Note for Saturday

Hey everyone, a quick update.
My husband/sexy beast/sweet thang has ordered the CBD oil. It's on its way and is estimated to be somewhere in the vicinity of Houston. Hey, it could be in Timbuktu for all I know. It should get her on the 24th or sometime after. I'm up right now. It's after midnight, 3rd night can't sleep, and in so much fucking pain. My fingers, wrists, and elbows hurt and it's hard to type. I feel like everytime my back throws a zinger down my legs that my toes could shoot bullets. There is a major cold front on its way and I'm feeling that fucker big time. My regular pain meds are not working in the prescribed doses. I want so much to double up on them but I won't.
Lucy keeps coming out of the bedroom to check on me. She stayed for a short while, cuddling next to me and when I told her mommy wasn't feeling good she got the message and went back to the bedroom. She comes to check on me every now and then. I expect her within the next 10 minutes to peek around the sofa to see if I'm okay. She's such a worry wart.
I've been looking up New York Style Cheese Cake recipes on the internet. Most say to add 1/4 cup flour to keep it from cracking. I want a nice creamy but firm cheesecake that doesn't taste like it has flour in it. I saw one recipe that says to add 2 tablespoons of corn starch. I'm at a loss. One says to bake it at 400F degrees for 10 minutes then for 325 for an hour. Another says 325 and another says 250. Does anyone have a creamy cheesecake recipe that won't crack that they are willing to share? Email me at -  falconstar926@gmail.com 
Wow, I guess this could be what happens when you don't sleep for a few days. You start begging for a decent recipe for cheesecake. I'm going crazy.

Monday, January 14, 2019

Monday, I Told You To Fuck Off

SPECIAL NOTE**Just to let everyone know. I found out CBD oil IS legal without a prescription in Texas now. The thing is I didn't know this. So David is going to go get me a bottle of water-soluble CBD this Friday. I do hope this helps me and I will let all y'all know how I'm doing with it. I have heard all kinds of things about it so let's see what it can do for me.**
This is a really late post. Please move on if you have better things to do because this is a bad post. I'll be complaining and this will just bring y'all down, a whole fucking lot. I haven't slept well for the past 4 nights. So much pain in my back, legs, and arms. I'm not sleeping, I'm not eating. I have no appetite and no energy. It hurts to walk, sit, stand or lie down. I'm so tired. I need to rest. I'm having serious doubts about the doctor I went to see. The one that diagnosed me with MCTD - Lupus/RA/Myositis. I still don't think I have lupus. The lab results say it's a very, very mild form of the disease but I still disagree with him. It's not Lupus. It has to be something else so I'm going to challenge his diagnosis when I see him in March. I want more testing if that's what it takes. I want to know what is going on and how to either stop it or cure it if there is a cure. 
It was overcast and cold on Saturday so I tackled the roses in the front yard and pulled weeds. Well, some of it. David later came out and finished what I couldn't. He pulled down some of the vines and knocked down a few hornets nests. He refused to cut the Robinhood rose vines. Too many thorns. He hates roses with thorns. I was in a lot of pain so I went inside and took a hot shower and went to bed early. I think it was around 1:30 in the afternoon or something like that. My brother called and I bullshitted with him on the phone for a while and then I fell asleep and didn't wake up until around 3am on Sunday morning.

I had a butt load of energy and I had to use it up before I lost it so I made a carrot cake that was so damned good. I cut it into serving sizes and then froze it so I could put the slices into individual Foodsaver baggies that I made. I then threw them into the small chest freezer. I made meatloaf, a pot roast, stew, baked 4 chicken breasts, spaghetti, a marinara sauce, macaroni & cheese, and par-cooked some veggies. I sealed everything in individual serving sizes in Foodsaver pouches so that if I should happen to have another bad episode, which I'm having now, today, he will have dinners and desserts for several weeks set up. This is in case I have no energy to cook. Otherwise, everything is taken care of for him. Today I'm taking out a pouch of frozen stew for him. I'm not hungry. After I finish this post I will go take a quick hot shower to make my muscles and joints feel better. I might go lie down for a while too.
Anna took this picture of Lucy
on her phone last week.
So, that is what I'm doing right now. I'll be staying in bed today again with Lucy watching me like a hawk. I wonder what goes through her worried little mind. Like, is she saying mommy don't die? Daddy sometimes forgets us, so please don't die. She has that kind of look on her little face when she is with me. And yes, David does forget them sometimes. Like when I'm stuck in bed or in the hospital, he will forget to let the puppies outside or feed them. I have to remind him, always. Otherwise, I take care of the fur babies. 
Looking out the window in the bedroom. It is cold outside. I want so much to get dressed and go outside and finish any of the yard work. So much to do while the weather is cold. It is the best time to cut back some of our plants right now so that new growth will come in the spring. I'm tired, sleep is calling. Y'all have a magical day.

Thursday, January 10, 2019

This is Why I Can't Have Nice Things

David told me last night that this year he was thinking of getting a couple of flamingo yard thingies. I looked at him all of a sudden realizing he forgot about the little tiff we had about flamingos a few years ago. I just stared at him. He looks back at me and asks, "what?"
I said, "I told you if we get flamingo yard ornaments it will be my way."
He completely forgot our previous argument. I couldn't believe he was bringing this up all over again.
I said, "David? Hon? We will only have flamingos my way. That's it, end of story. I told you those pink trailer trash lawn ornaments will not grace our lawn. Not no way. Not no how. End. Of. Story. Kaputt!"
"Okay," he countered.
"No! No okay about it. No. Not unless you let me have what I want."
He thought silently and carefully about what he was going to say because if he agreed to my demands he was going to lose this fight no matter what. I was not going to allow those ugly birds on the lawn. NO. WAY.
"So what will it take to work this out? I really want to get a couple of pink flamingos to dress up the yard. I'm serious," he then sighed, crossed his arms, leaning against the kitchen counter. I looked at him and smiled my evil smile.
"I will let you have them but it will be my way. I want my statues too."
We are at an impasse in our negotiations. He won't let me have my statues and I won't let him have his. So this is the reason why I can't have nice things in the yard. David just has no class.
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