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violence, terrible grammar, gratuitous sex, strong odors, seed porn, and possibly improper French

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

I Went Back On My Word

I seemed to recall saying something in yesterdays post, hmmm what was it about?? Oh yeah!! I said I was going to do absofuckinlutely nothing but relax on a couch unless it catches fire. Well... I caught fire.

I started cleaning right after I put my mini laptop, Little Hal, on the coffee table. What tipped it off was the floor. It was filthy. David likes to play fetch with Spunky in the house and the area from the kitchen to the front door is all wood floor. There was dirt and dried slobber from them playing while I was down for the count. Who's dried slobber, I have no idea but it had to go.

I threw the piggies puppies outside while I tore the house apart. I dusted, vacuumed, mopped, washed drapes, washed walls, and windows. Then I did laundry. It took me a good six hours but I got this house cleaned the way I like it.

When David came home from work for his daily lunch, he began throwing the dog's ball in  the hallway for them to chase. I screamed, NO MORE PLAYING IN THE HOUSE!! I then read him his Miranda rights and he got mad. I got madder and told him I want the house to stay clean. Play with the dogs outside. He wasn't a happy camper but he agreed to behave. So, how long will this place stay nice and clean is anybody's guess.


  1. It never seems to fail that the minute I decide I'm going to do absolutely nothing, I go on a full-blown cleaning binge. Maybe we should all decide to do nothing more often?

  2. Everytime I say I'm not doing something my ass catches on fire. Then those days when I have all this crap planned my ass gets stuck in the couch cushions.

  3. You make a list, you'll forget it or don't follow it. You want to clean, you get lazy. You make plans, something fucks it all up. No matter what, it always happens

  4. That's always the way isn't it? Good luck keeping the dog play outside.

  5. My own plaything refuses to take his shoes off when he comes inside ... I'm pretty sure just because he likes to watch my head explode in frustration. Grrrrr ...

  6. Aaaaahahahaha... Inevitably, as soon as I clean, Britt makes a mess... or I do. *facepalm* If my apartment ever stays clean for more than a day (and that's pushing it...), I may just drop dead of a heart attack... o_O


let 'er rip

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