Dear Pain Meds and Heating Pad,
It was such a lovely weekend that we had together. Yes, a threesome is delightful but it gets old when it lasts the whole weekend. It's not you, it's me. You see, I can only take so much of you both before I get bored and want to seek something more in life. Something that makes me feel better. Something that I just can't find with you anymore. Please don't feel sad because I'm leaving you for something better. Just remember the love we shared this weekend, and that one day I will come back to you once more.
Leeanna's Arthritic Bad Back