MY MINIONS

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Thursday, November 30, 2017

How the Internet really started according to the Bible



PLEASE DO NOT GOOGLE THIS ONE OR CHECK WITH SNOPES.... THEY WILL LIE TO YOU. TRUST ME! 

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy (Dot for short). Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com. 

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?" 

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?" 

And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)." 

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent. 

To prevent neighboring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew to The People (HTTP). 

And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS. And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land. Indeed he did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks. 

And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others." And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or eBay as it came to be known. He said, "We need a name that reflects what we are." 

And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators." "YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com. 

Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside. 

It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE). 
That is how it all began. And that's the truth. I would not make up this stuff. 

Wednesday, November 29, 2017

Tuesday, November 28, 2017

SPOILER ALERT ~ Tedious Post

It's early in the morning. I didn't get much sleep again. When I finish writing this I'll go back to bed and sleep on the heating pad, that's if I can sleep at all. I did way too much house cleaning and laundry on Saturday and I'm feeling it now. I was hurting so bad yesterday that I spent nearly the entire day in bed on the heating pad. To make matters worse, there's another front coming in soon. It's like a double whammy. I see my pain doctor on the 15th so that's a good thing. I need to let him know about the Diclofenac. See what he says about it because if he puts me on it instead of the Hydrocodone I'm taking now, I'll have to let my family doctor know about it so he can monitor my kidney and liver functions. 

Thanksgiving was awesome. The pork tenderloin turned out heavenly. I made an orange blossom honey mustard sauce that was the bomb. It made the tenderloin amazing. My step-daughter came down from Austin to see us. She had Thanksgiving at her grandma's house with a few family members. Then she came to visit us for a while. We had to lock Lucy up in the back bedroom because she just goes crazy when Anna comes to visit. Spunky (who is totally blind) bumped around the house the whole time. Anna calls him the Roomba dog because he bumps into a wall and turns around and goes his merry little way until he bumps into a table leg or something else. He then gets tired of bumping around and goes to his chair and sleeps just like a Roomba. I never really thought of Spunky like that until now. 

David went back to work yesterday and Lucy was broken hearted. She was palling around with David the whole week that he was off. They went everywhere together. So yesterday was her first day without her daddy and she pouted all day long. When I started dinner, she lit up. She likes to watch me cook because I let her taste test almost everything that isn't spiced or have herbs on it. She loves raw carrots. So I let her have a few sliced carrots to chew on while I made dinner. Her favorites are carrots and sweet potatoes. When I make a baked sweet potato for myself she and Spunky always get a bit of my potato in their dinner bowls. It's good for them so I don't mind sharing.

Sunday, November 26, 2017

Friday, November 24, 2017

Friday Funny

Tuesday I got bored so I went to Youtube.com and typed "funny Japanese game shows" in the search box and this is what I found. Enjoy!

Thursday, November 23, 2017


Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

It's Tuesday

There's no sunshine this morning. I woke up at 8 am and the sun is behind clouds today. Another cold front is sliding in tonight with a bit of wind but guess what? It won't be cold until Thanksgiving morning. It's supposed to be around 37 degrees on turkey day morning and then barely getting up to 70 later. 

My Bose earbuds bit the dust last night while I was listening to music and when I came into the living room this morning I found a new set of headphones. David went to Wallyworld this morning to buy a new water filter for my Keurig and he picked up some NEON headphones for me. I tried them out and was very impressed with the sound quality. They're only $20 and if y'all have little girls these would make great stocking stuffers. They come in neon pink, blue, purple, and yellowish green. David got me blue, my favorite color. And no, Wallyworld nor Neon is not paying me to say anything. I just took it upon myself to let Y'all know about a neat gift idea for Christmas. So take it or leave it at that.

I have to go get my coffee and think up some stuff to keep David busy for a few days. He's getting bored like a kid on winter vacation from school. He wants to go drive up to Luling to have BBQ for lunch and bring home some sausage. He says Luling's City Market has the best sausage. So I guess we're going out to eat for lunch.

Monday, November 20, 2017

It's Monday

I'm on my third day of incarceration. David will be off all week and I'm stuck in the house, trying to be good. Yes, I promised not to kill David before Thanksgiving. After that, it's open season. He stays in his part of the house and I stay in the living room with the puppies. It's working out so far.
A cold front came through Saturday afternoon. It's cold this morning and I'm loving every minute of it. This is more like the weather we should be having in November. Cold mornings in the low 40's and cool evenings in the 60's and 70's.  Another cold front is set to come through again on Tuesday. It won't change anything.  Although, it would be nice to have a bit of snow.
On Saturday, David went grocery shopping for me. It's hard for me to stand for a long time because of my back, so he does it. Anywho, he picked up the best looking pork tenderloin on sale that I have ever seen. Not an ounce of fat on it, so lean. I cut 6 chops out of that and then cut it lengthwise to make 2 nice roasts out of it. One will be for Thanksgiving and the other for Yule. 

He also bought a huge turkey breast that I seared in a nice large saute pan with butter and oil, 3 smashed garlic cloves, fresh thyme, sage and if you like, rosemary with stems, then I basted the breast, set the cooked herbs on top of the breast and put it in a preheated 350 oven for 45 minutes to an hour. It came out so nice. I had 2 slices of it for dinner and I made David his favorite meatloaf. After the turkey breast cooled during dinner I cut 2/3's of it into really thin slices and put that into a container for turkey sandwiches and 3 thick slices I cut up into really small chunks for turkey salad later in the week for me. David hates turkey except for slices in a sandwich, just to let y'all know, that's why I made the meatloaf for him. So I have the fresh cranberries made, bagged and in the freezer. All I have to do is make mashed potatoes, the green beans, the pork roast and that's it. Oh, I made a pecan pie for dessert, which is in the refrigerator in a pie keeper. I'm so ready for turkey day, y'all. 

Sunday, November 19, 2017

Saturday, November 18, 2017

Music For a Savage Saturday

For those of you who don't know me all that well, I love British comedians. Tracey Ullman has been one of my favorites. It was in this very video that I first saw her. Besides, I was a Beatles fan and I had the worst crush on Paul McCartney. I think this video is so cute. Please enjoy.

Thursday, November 16, 2017

Canada Eh?


Wednesday, November 15, 2017

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

Stupid is as Stupid Does

Last night I had a bout with my usual insomnia. So, I decided to catch up on the news. I was reading the LA Times online and there was this story about the Faux News poster boy for right-wing propaganda and spreading conspiracy theories, Sean Hannity. Apparently, Keurig pulled their ads from Hannity's show because they didn't like Sean defending Roy Moore. So Sean took to Twitter to bad mouth Keurig coffee makers to which Seans fans started to post pictures of destroyed Keurig machines. Now, these Keurigs retail at $99+. How stupid can people get? You have to read this.


















Monday, November 13, 2017

It's Monday

Seriously, I did.
I'm a little late posting today because I went to work out and almost forgot I had to have my blood drawn today. Yeah. I hadn't eaten yet so I was in the clear because it had to be a fasting draw. Everything worked out fine. The doctor is keeping a close look on my blood sugar since fat old people like me are more likely to have diabetes. No, I'm not diabetic, yet. But I'm working on it. Aahahahaaa! Really I'm not working on it. My doctor was also worried because my white cell count was 15 last time I had my blood drawn. He thinks I should see a Hematologist but he won't listen to me when I tell him that my back is arthritic. My white count is going to be up for a reason. Arthritis automatically raises the white cells in your body because they are fighting inflammation from arthritis. OY!! Not to mention the guy that drew my blood wrapped my arm with enough co-ban to tie up 5 people. Shit! Just put a band-aid on the bitch and leave the wrap for mummies.
Next week David will be off for Thanksgiving week. My incarceration starts this Friday. Oh whoa is me. Yeah, I'll have to endure the sound of daytime trash TV for 10 days. ~sigh~ Sometimes I wish I had a large sprawling home where I could escape the sounds of Jerry Springer and Maury. But not this lifetime. All I gotta say is there better be no Christian hell when I die because I'll be so fucking pissed if I have to endure those two guys and the shouting trailer trash scum from the audience for the rest of my afterlife.

David is home for lunch. The first this out of his mouth was, "you took the car this morning." Well yes, I wasn't going to walk four miles to get my blood drawn and all. He was complaining that I parked the car too far into the carport. He should be happy I parked the way I did and not out in the street. Well, I have a deep hole to go dig to hide David's body in and then laundry to fold. Y'all have a magical day.









Sunday, November 12, 2017

Friday, November 10, 2017

Thursday, November 9, 2017

Canada Eh?


Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Wet Dog Wednesday



Today's post is dedicated to my brother, 
who happens to love German Shepherds






























Tuesday, November 7, 2017

It's Tuesday

Well, this is a very late post. Sorry. We have a cold front coming down our way tomorrow morning and the temps will be dipping into the 40's again. Right now I'm on the floor with my lower back planted firmly on a skinny pillow and a heating pad on top of that; my legs are propped on the seated cushions of the love seat. It was the only way to ease my pain. And NO I ain't gonna get another lumbar injection. My mind is made up. I'd rather have my eyes plucked out than have another needle enter my spine. My brother told me about a drug he's taking to easy his lower back pain. It's called Diclofenac. I already checked out the side effects and all the info on Drugdigest.com. Has anyone ever taken that for pain? I know it's an anti-inflammatory drug but has anyone had success with managing their pain while taking this drug? Did it help you? Please let me know. 

Anywho, right now I'm comfy cozy. Lucy has been my nurse. Yeah, she's sleeping on the job again right next to me. She knows when I'm having pain. Last night she slept next to me while I was binge-watching a Korean TV series on Hulu. I love Korean shows. I dearly love their historical stories. Since I'll be up again tonight, I'll have to find either another series to dive into or just catch up on my book reading.  

Oh, an update on that Texas church shooter. The Air Force neglected to enter the information about Kelly's domestic violence as well as his psychological issues. The man was held at a mental health hospital in New Mexico after assaulting his wife and child. He was there for a year, he escaped and was caught at a bus station in El Paso Texas. He was discharged and moved back home to New Braunfels. One witness to the shooting inside the church was shot in the arm and played dead. She said Kelly was wearing black tactical gear, shooting as he walked down the aisle of the church. She said women and children screamed as he shot them.
I know it's horrific. But if it stirs something inside you to call and bitch out your state representative and senators to grow a pair or get a spine and do something about restricting automatic and semi-automatic rifles or even high magazine ammo clips that would start something. Just keep badgering them until they do something to get this rolling in the direction of stopping the carnage.

Monday, November 6, 2017

Sad Post


My weekend was going great, yes it was until an alert came on a ticker during the Texans football game that there was a shooting in Sutherland Springs. That's here in Texas. Where church, football, and BBQ are king. It's just a 15-minute drive from where we live, In our own backyard. That town is 1/10th the size of Seguin where we live, it's a tiny, tiny town of 600 people. 

This morning The whole story unfolded that It was a young man of 26, who apparently lived in New Braunfels, drove to Sutherland Springs and shot 26 parishioners dead and 20 injured. One 5-year-old was shot 4 times. He was transported to University Hospital via AirLIFE helicopter. He survived after emergency surgery. His mother and 2 sisters were among the dead. The age range of the dead was one 18-month-old infant girl to 77 years old, 12 children died. One family lost 8 members of their family, which included children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. The 18-month-old infant girl was one of the children of that family. It was a tiny church where no one could hide from a gunman. The motive is believed to be domestic. his in-laws went to the First Baptist Church. Apparently, the mother-in-law sent Kelly a threatening text. They were not in the church at the time of the shooting.
Kelly used a Rugar AR-15 assault rifle which he bought in San Antonio. I'm wondering why the persons that sold Kelly the guns didn't see the bad-conduct discharge from the Air Force for spousal and child abuse. Why was he sold the guns? That's the big question. Democrats on Capitol Hill are talking gun control again. Republicans don't want to hear about it. You can read everything here about the shooting if you want. I have a house to clean and laundry to start. 



Sunday, November 5, 2017

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