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Thursday, December 16, 2010

Death By Husband

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times..."
—Opening line of A Tale of Two Cities

In less than 48 hours David will be home for two whole sickening freaking weeks. Yes, I know your plight Judith. I sympathize with you as you do me.

Right now I am trying to think up things to keep him busy and out of my hair. And then there are the things I am thinking of doing to him if he bothers me ... never mind. I can get into a whole lot of trouble if they find the body. Goddess, it was so much easier living near the desert in El Paso. So many places to hide ...  the bodies ... well I digress way to much it seems.

I was thinking of getting him to help me move all my treasures [ my desk, computer, art table, bookcases, etc..] into his daughter's old room. That way I can have peace and quiet for a bit. That would mean no more "hey hon, check out this video" or " look, look, look, you're gonna miss this!!!"  I'll show him " you're gonna miss this."  If this works the way I plan. I should be able to get more stuff done without his silly interruptions.

Then I'll have to find other things to keep him busy besides watching Jerry "Trash TV" Springer all day long and then coming around and asking me if I want to go for a ride to some store with him. OMG!!!  I'm gonna die a horrible, way too unfortunate death!!!  Why me, Goddess?  I've been a good Witch most of my life. I never killed ... anyone that didn't really need ... never mind.


  1. My condolences dear witch. Sweet Man and I used to have a similar relationship....who am I fooling....we still do. On the days he doesn't have to go to work until 1 in the afternoon, I am like a caged animal. Yep, tried the odd jobs, honey do's, find something to watch on the TV, go somewhere and shop.....but with age comes wisdom, er laziness and now I just blog, work on a project and act like I am's working for now. Oh hell, who am I fooling. Men, gotta love um. The Olde Bagg, Linda

  2. Hubs and I have this arrangement that I work and do stuff around the house while he sleeps...then he gets up and says lets go do if I haven't already been doing things all day...but it's different when he wants to go play...Yes, Linda, gotta love em...

  3. I remind my son all the time...."I know great place's to hide a body!" I'm making a list of things for him to do.... they don't need being done, but he's gonna do it anyway!!!! Hiding in my room on the computer doesn't work... when he knocks on the door (17000 times a day!) it scares the s**t out of me!!!!

  4. My husband works from home and I'm a stay at home mom. He also travels a lot for work. So, basically he's either up my ass or MIA. Some times I miss him, sometimes I want him to go missing : )

  5. You're really looking forward to this, eh? ^^

    Fortunately, the BF (who has 3 weeks off) will spend most of the time with his brother's family at their mother's place, and I refused to come. Which means he will call at the most unfortunate times (like, 2 A.M. when I am sleeping and grumpy), but I will have the flat to myself for a few days and hope to get as much done as possible. I may even miss him a little.

  6. My offer to help you dispose of bodies still stands...



let 'er rip

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