MY MINIONS

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Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Things You Should Tell Your Spouse About

Sorry my dear minions but this Polycythemia shit can knock you for a loop. I feel like I have the flu, I swear to the Goddess it does. But I take this one day at a time. Anywho, This past weekend David and I were playing around with ideas for gardening and what to do with all the damned seeds I have sitting in plastic bins. Little plastic bins that is.

Well we decided to do a little cleaning up in the yard. I started a load of laundry and joined him in "The Shed". I was coming around the corner of the house when I heard the booming voice.
Keeper of The Shed: "What dusth thou need my son?"
Right then I joined David and asked who the guy in the clouds was with the booming voice. 
David: Oh that's The Keeper of The Shed.
Me: Really? Where does he go when you close the shed door?
David: I don't know.
Me: Well I'd like to know. Also how did you get him in here?
David: I don't know.
Me: I mean he sounds like an awfully big dude and I don't see...
David: Honey?
Me: how he could fit...
David:  My love?
Me: into such a small...
David: My sweet?
Me: cramped shed. WHAT?
David: Move so I can close the door.
Walking to the front of the house, David has the weed whacker.
Me: So when did you get him, huh?
David ignores me
Me: Was he expensive? Do you have to feed him? Do you have to let him out for a while now and then? What's his real name, I mean "The Keeper of The Shed" is cool and all but he has to have a name. I bet it's Sid, or Ernie, or Leon or something like that? Is he married?
David starts up the whacker with one angry pull.
Me: OK!!! GUESS I'LL GO INSIDE. I KNOW I'M NOT WANTED.

I went inside and finished the house work and laundry. When David came back in, he got a shower and we had lunch. I cleaned up the lunch mess and David decided to help me by putting away the clothes. He by chance opened my closet to put a dress away when a wee little old  grandmotherly voice with a New Jersey accent went.
Keeper of The Queen's Closet:  Yo! what can I do for ya sweet cheeks?  
David: LEEANNA!!!!!!!!    

5 comments:

  1. ROFLMAO, let's hope the two keepers don't meet, you might get baby keepers of all sorts of things!

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  2. OMG!!! I laughed so hard I think I peed my big girl panties!!!!!

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  3. You are hilarious! What part of Jersey is that Grandmother from? Maybe I know her ; )

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  4. Best post I have read so far today. I have keepers living all over my place too. The one in my dive bag is always asking me to check the batteries in my dive lights. Sea Witch

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  5. You are so funny! And why the hell don't I have my own keepers?

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let 'er rip

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