MY MINIONS

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Tickle Me Tuesday

Moral To The Story:

The teacher  gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them a  story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and,  one by one, began to tell their stories. 

There were all the  regular types of stuff: spilled milk and pennies saved. But then the  teacher realized, much to her dismay, that only Janie was left.

‘Janie, do you have a story to share?'

''Yes ma'am. My daddy told me a story about my Mommy. She was a Marine pilot in Desert  Storm, and her plane got hit.
She had to bail out over enemy territory,  and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife.

She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn't  break, and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of
  20 Iraqi troops. She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets,  killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands. 

''Good Heavens," said the horrified teacher. "What did your daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?"

“Don't mess with Mommy when she's been drinking."
 

Monday, October 26, 2015

Halloween Tag


I'm doing the Halloween Tag this year. You answer 13 questions and then pass it on to some poor unsuspecting soul out in blogger land. Well, I'm passing it on to anyone who wants to do it. I dare you to come out of your coffins and answer the same questions. BWAAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!!! *cough cough*

1. Favorite Halloween song?

I have always loved Ghostbusters By Ray Parker Jr. The movie was funny and campy and I loved that too.

2. Witch or Vampire?

Why not both. After all, Elvira was one.

3. Favorite thing about Halloween?

The spookiness of it. Like when you are out at night and the wind is blowing the leaves and you think someone is following you. It's so spooky.

4. Halloween party or scary movie marathon?

I would definitely do the scary movie marathon. But I would start it like three days before Halloween. The first day I would hit the stores for movie marathon goodies like popcorn, sodas, booze, sweets, ingredients for potstickers and sandwiches, pizza rolls, etc. Then I would hit Hastings for all their scary movies, about 30 of them. Then I would get into my onesie and put on my "killer rabbit" (yeah I got them here) slippers from the Holy Grail and enjoy.

5. Skeletons or zombies?

Never ask a licensed Zombie Killer that question. Zombies duh! I'm just waiting for the Zombie Apocolypse to happen. David and will be soooooo tickled to death.

6. Favorite Halloween candy?

It's a toss up there. Candy corn and M&Ms are my favs.

7. Favorite Halloween Movie?

Okay, I did say I loved Ghostbusters but I have to say the Underworld films. They are the best.

8. Favorite Halloween costume?

I would have to say, Witch. That way I can put a curse on my enemies and they wouldn't know that I meant it. *cackle*

9. Favorite Halloween store?

It would have to be Micheals and several online places.

10. Jack-o-lanterns, yes or no?

Oh hell yes! It wouldn't be Halloween without jack-o-lanterns. Stupid question.

11. Bat's or Black Cats?

Both are equally scary on Halloween.

12. Is Halloween your favorite holiday?

It's THE holiday. What other holiday lets you get all dressed up in a scary costume to get candy and scare the living shit out of people at the same time and then run around in the neighborhood after your bedtime as a kid. Yes, it is THE holiday.

13. Pumpkin spice latte or hot chocolate?

Whoever came out with that pumpkin spice latte shit should be horse whipped for sure. Must have been some lousy hipster. I'm a hot coffee freak, no cream or sugar, but hot chocolate does it in a pinch.

Okay, now I double bat shit dare you all to do the same. Answer these 13 questions and post them on your blog before Halloween. BWAHAAAHAHAHAHAAAAHAHAAAAAAAAA!! *cough cough*






Friday, October 23, 2015

It's Friday

No, really! I'm going to be more productive. At least I'll try. So far I have the second load of laundry in the washer. Yes, I know it's almost 10 a.m. but what can I say. I fell asleep. I stayed up most of the night watching the Benghazi Hearings post show. It was interesting and fun watching Gowdy wipe egg shit off his face for even leading this Witch Hunt.

So, did anyone watch the Benghazi Witch Hunt yesterday? Maybe even snippets of it now and then? No? Maybe? Well, I did. It was a true show of the GOP wasting everyone's time and money. They didn't come away from this hearing any different than the last one. There was absolutely no change from Hillary's answers to their seemingly ludicrous questions. They just kept drilling her hoping she would fuck up and say something totally different. It never happened. Not once. She held her composure 99.9% of the time while they yelled and screamed in her face. She took it all in and never once raised her voice. I did see her roll her eyes . . . once. I laughed.  It was simply a Witch Hunt in the purest form.
So now what? Will they wait another year when she's leading in the Presidential Polls in 2016? Will they wait for the next right moment to strike and think they can drag her through the mud once again with the same shit all over again? Who knows. Personally any hearings in the future on this shit should be charged to the GOP. Make them pay for all this crap instead of sticking us with the bill at the end of their meal.
BWAAAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAAAAA!


Monday, October 19, 2015

More Weird Shit

I've heard that the northeastern states are undergoing the prettiest autumn in years. You lucky dogs! Here it's starting to get cooler during the night but that's the usual thing at this time of year. Now, if it should happen to snow here in Seguin say, in the next three weeks, then I'm leaving the planet because shit is about to get real.

Pebbles is completely abnormal again. Yes, she's playing with shadows and staring at dead people in the kitchen. That is the norm for her. She does this "Evil Dead" stare at nothing and then she turns her head really  s l o w  towards you if you just happen to be watching her and call her name.

It's that freaky scary type shit, especially if you're alone with her. Lucy refuses to be around her if I'm not in the room. Then again, Lucy just thinks Pebbles is bat shit crazy. I've told Lucy to sleep with one eye open at night.
Anywho, The Walking Dead was weird last night. If you taped it on DVD and haven't seen it, then,  

                                                        *SPOILER ALERT*

The wolves broke into the compound and went on a killing spree. These people are fucking strange. They didn't steal from anyone, they just broke in and killed anyone they saw. Most of the people in from the compound group got ahold of guns thanks to Carol and killed a few of the Wolves before they turned and ran. But it was a pretty good show. I wasn't expecting that all to happen, though. It did explain why the truck horn sounded which attracted the walkers off of the road from last week's episode. Cool Beans.

Well, I have to throw myself at the mercy of my heating pad so my back can get some relief. Ciao y'all.




Monday, October 12, 2015

It's Monday - Let's Do This

David is home today. He took a birthday - day off. They can do that where he works. Lucky blankety* blank* blank* blank*! Anywho, he WAS watching Jerry Springer (morning edition) and IS NOW watching some sad excuse for a scary movie onTV. It's the type of movie a guy would take his girlfriend to on a Saturday night for a makeout session. Yeah, it's not even close to being rated as interesting or good. It's that kind of bad movie. This kind of shit will be happening all day here so I'll be hiding out doing house work and such.

Over the weekend, David and I went to dinner with his daughter up in San Marcos at Saltgrass. We had a great birthday dinner. Then Sunday morning we went to IHop for breakfast. I  made his favorite meatloaf for dinner and then we settled back to watch The Walking Dead premier.
Pebbles is doing much better. She is sleeping right now. She seems to be back to her old funny self,  playing with Lucy and teasing Spunky. I'm so relieved that things are okay with her again. I was so worried about that little girl.
Seed porn from the Petunia Garden
Oh! I got some seed porn in the mail Friday afternoon. Yes! I'm so excited. These are the petunia seeds I was looking around on the web for so long. I'm going to plant them this winter under the planting lights and then repot them into hanging baskets for the front porch in the spring. I got them from Etsy, a little shop called The Petunia Garden.  You can see some of these seeds are featured on the page when you go there.
African Sunset - Celebrity Blue Ice - Blue Daddy - Baddy Mix - Celebrity Ice - Cascade Orchid Mist and  Limbo Red Veined. Each one of these tiny plastic bags in the picture contains teeny tiny seeds. You petunia lovers need to go check out this place. I love that site and I want to go back and order a lot more from the owner. She has beautiful flowers and there are also herbs and veggie seeds.

Well, I have to go do one last load of laundry. Chao

Friday, October 9, 2015

Life is Good Again


Yesterday afternoon at about 2:30 I got the call to finally pick Pebbles up. The vet tech said she would be out of recovery and ready to go home at around 4:30, so David came home early and we both went to get her. It felt like forever on the drive out there.
Pebbles

When they called us in for the consultation, Pebbles was lying on the exam table on her tummy half conscious of what was going on or who was there. I hugged her and gave her a little kiss on the forehead. She barely noticed me, poor baby. The vet gave us a rundown of what they did for her and the blood tests. As the vet was talking, Pebbles was watching her so intensely. I mean, Pebbles was staring at the vet like she had some idea of what was going on, but she was staring at her with sleepy eyes. It was clear that Pebbles was not all there. She was so relaxed and quiet. 

The vet finished and we all looked at Pebbles as she continued to stare at the vet. I was a funny quiet moment then I said that she was thinking that my vet is saying blah blah blah and I don't care. We all started laughing because of this little completely relaxed half comatose dog on the table looked so funny. Then I said, "Lucy misses you, baby." Pebbles immediately perked up. Her eyes opened wide and she got up to walk over to me. I remember saying, "She's alive!" Just like Dr. Frankenstein did when the monster moved. Everyone laughed.
Pebbles is on two antibiotics and medication for her liver. She has a bit of a cough from the anesthesia and the vet said it should go away in two days time. if it doesn't go away by Saturday to call her. She looks fine and is eating pretty good for having mouth surgery. We just have to keep her off the kibble and rawhide bone for a couple of weeks. She was bleeding a bit last night, but it stopped and there has been no blood since then. She is sleeping right now. 

On the other hand, Lucy is a wreck. You see, Lucy is a bit of a germaphobe. She runs from anyone, be it dog, cat, or human, who coughs or sneezes on or within five feet of her. She must have died from a terrible sickness like the plague in a previous lifetime because she has always been like this. She refuses to go near Pebbles because of the cough. Right now Lucy is hiding under my desk, shaking to death. Pebbles coughs in her sleep and it scares the shit out of Lucy. 

All is well now and I thank you all so much for your get well wishes. Now I'm praying nothing else goes wrong with anyone or anything for a hell of a loooooooong, long, long, long time.

Thursday, October 8, 2015

Blood Everywhere

I'm posting late today because I've been on the phone with the Veterinarian most of the morning about Pebbles. You see the "Strange One" has been bleeding from the mouth since probably Tuesday night, only David didn't take notice of it. I noticed it when I woke up and found a puddle of blood at the bottom of the bed where she slept after David put her there.

You see when David gets up he feeds the puppies and lets them out and then lets them into the bedroom so they can wake me up. Only they didn't. They slept up until I woke them up and I noticed the large blood puddles at the foot of the bed where Pebbles sleeps. So I grabbed a wash cloth and wet it with warm water and cleaned her up, then started looking for the cause. But I couldn't find one. There wasn't blood anywhere. I was at a loss for where it was all from. So I got another clean wash cloth wet it and started examining the other two dogs. Nothing. I was beginning to think I dreamed it all. So I backtracked and grabbed Pebbles for another exam. Still nothing! WTF!?? 

So then I grabbed the blood-soaked bedding and started a load with peroxide and again with bleach. I called David and asked if he knew anything about the blood and, of course, he didn't. But, then again David doesn't notice things around here like I do. I'm the one with the bionic hearing, nose, and eyes.

Well, the only thing left was the bed that the dogs sleep on and their blankets. I checked and found large spots of blood. I was thinking that one of them got a dew claw stuck and tore the thing open on their leg. But who? They were all in the kitchen sleeping on the rug in front of the sink. Except this time, I did notice the blood near Pebbles front paw. so I grabbed up yet another wet wash cloth and checked her paws and the dew claws ... nothing. 

Where the fuck was this blood coming from?? So I ran for another wash cloth this time wet it with warm saline solution and checked her mouth. BINGO!! Blood! On the right side of her mouth. It was coming from there. But she wouldn't let me open her mouth to check it. SHIT!! I finally got my legs wrapped around her and pried her mouth open with my fingers to see better. Would you believe I couldn't tell if it was a missing tooth or if she had bitten her tongue. She kept biting my fingers, the little piranha. 

David came home for lunch a few minutes later while I was on the phone with the vet near our home to see if they could see her on an emergency. Nope, all booked up for the day. David went back to work and started calling vet offices around Seguin (pronounced Si-geen ... i as in squid). Everyone was booked solid. So he called me and asked me to call around in New Braunfels area. I was lucky to find one veterinarian to take her. So I drove to the vet's and had all her info from our regular vet office transferred to them so it would speed up the process. It saved me time from having to fill out all that paperwork. 

So now, we know there is a small hole inside her mouth where I think she might have made when she tried to chew a hard doggie biscuit most likely Tuesday night. Not sure but I think that is when it happened because she was having trouble with it then. 

She was taken into surgery this morning (YES! I'm worried as hell) and she  is in recovery. They ran blood tests to see if she might be lax in the clotting factors  that the liver usually puts out. Yes, she is an elderly dog ( 9 years), but not that old. I would think she has something like 5 more years if not more to go. She does have liver problems that we have been monitoring for quite some time now. So I'm hoping the vet calls back soon with some good news. I'm on pins and needles at this time. I'm not ready for this gang.


Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Tuesday - The Ugly One

It's 64 degrees outside this morning. YEAH, 64 fucking cool degrees, People! The bad thing is that it will be hot today. San Antonio says 91, but I say in the mid to high 80's. You see this is a small town. We don't have big blowhards running around warming up the air out here.
Anywho, I am enjoying my coffee right now with the windows open. The wind is blowing a light breeze just enough to make the wind chimes stir. It's pretty nice today so far. Yesterday I busted my ass cleaning and doing laundry because I didn't feel like it over the weekend. So today I don't have a thing to do. I was going to just stay in bed and watch TV all morning, but I can't do that. It wears on my mind that I'm doing nothing when I can be doing something. I just have to be busy or go insane.
David has a birthday coming up this Sunday and we will most likely make a day of it. He loves to go to IHop for breakfast on his B-day so IHop it is. Then we will be visiting friends if he feels like it. He has no family to speak of except his daughter. She will most likely come down from Austin to visit. I love when she comes to see us.
Sunday night also starts the new season of The Walking Dead. David is so psyched for that. He has gone completely nuts with this zombie craze. He has gotten completely into the online Walking Dead comic book. He even reads it when he comes home for lunch. I won't say every waking moment is spent on that online comic book, but it's close. Thank the Goddess that his office has limited online web access. Otherwise, he would never get shit done.
This has been one fucking boring post. I'm sorry, but this is a quiet town, nothing really interesting or big happens here. So I'm going to repot some house plants right now and pick up and shell some pecans that fell from the trees in the yard. I might make a pecan pie tomorrow and a couple of banana bread loaves. Who knows.

Monday, October 5, 2015

SNL on Trump

On Saturday night, David and I watched the SNL opening skit and nearly died laughing. You have to watch this. Well, you don't really HAVE to watch it if you don't want to. But it is funny and Cecily Strong is hilarious as Melania. The way she pronounces Republican and that "he puts his hair on one strand at a time," made me lose it completely. So if you didn't see this yet, enjoy.
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