Friday Funny

Bad Dog! No! No! That's My Name

My Dogs Are Becoming Human

Yesterday, David and I decided to give the puppies a much needed bath. The temperatures outside were in the 80's, but we knew the water would be much too cold for them. We gave them all an indoor bath/shower.

Lucy was first because she was the most unwilling of the group. Squirt was second followed by Spunky. I went into the bathroom to towel dry anyone of them that was finished. Both girls, dried and smelling clean were let out of the bathroom while Spunky enjoyed his bath. A moment after I let the girls out, Lucy somehow got back in by pushing on the door I thought I closed. She walked over to the shower door and looked back at me as if to say, " Mom will you please open the water fall room?"

I did, she looked in at Spunky and then started to leave. I was watching this happen. Squirt was by the bathroom door waiting for her to hurry out. They both walked very close together as they made their way down the hall to the media room. I sware it looked like they were talking about Spunky.

Then Lucy took a quick look back at me as I saw them go. She got very close to Squirt like she was saying to her in secret, "I'll tell you later."
Strange how they act so human.

Funny Religious Shit

Silly Sign Saturday

Friday Funny

A circus owner ran an ad for a lion tamer and two people

showed up to be interviewed for the job. One of them was 

a retired fireman in his late sixties and the other was a
gorgeous blonde in her mid-twenties.

The circus owner sits them down and tells them, 

"I'm not going to sugar-coat it. This is one ferocious lion. He
ate my last tamer so you two had better be good, or you're 

history. Here's your equipment - chair, a whip, and a gun. 

Who wants to try out first?"

The young woman says, "I'll go first." She walks past the 

chair, the whip and the gun and steps right into the

lion's cage.

The lion notices her entry and starts to snarl and pant. 

He roars and begins to charge her. About halfway there,
the blonde throws open her coat revealing her beautiful 

naked body.

The lion stops dead in his tracks, drops down on his belly 

and sheepishly crawls up to her. He starts licking her feet 

and ankles. He continues to lick and kiss her entire body for
several minutes and then rests his head at her feet.

The circus owner's jaw is on the floor.
He says, "I've never seen a display like that in my life."
He then turns to the retired fireman and asks, 

"Can you top that?"

The tough old smoke-eater replies, "No problem, just get that 

lion out of there."

So Much Crazy

Okay before I get started on today's blog, y'all really have to go check out Debra's blog this morning. It's about curling. Yes, an Olympic event. She beat me to this one. I was going to post it for tomorrow's blog post. But that's okay. It's so damned funny it'll make you spew your coffee like I did when I saw it. Really funny.

Anywho back to the main item. I have been getting all kinds of emails and phone calls asking if I'm still alive. Well yes, yes I am still alive. I've been living literally on my heating pad in the bedroom. No I can't sit up for long periods of time because my arthritic back has taken out a Hit on me. So I've been laying low, so to speak. Hell, it took me almost two days to write the ABC award post and 6 hours to write the Sunshine award post. Sheesh! I hate the fact that nothing is working against the pain because of all this moisture in the air. Today is a little better though. There is a front making it's way through our area sometime this afternoon, and the dryer air will be here for a few days. Not great news for the East Coast and Northern areas though. All y'all's going to be slapped like a red headed step child later today with more snow and ice.

In case you didn't see it, like you had to be blind I have a banner that I was asked if I would like to put up on my blog. I was more than happy to do this since it promotes Pagans. For doing this I was given a nice gift certificate of 10% off for me to spend and share with my blog audience. There is no expiration on this, so if you want something, but need to wait until later to take advantage of the 10% off coupon, I will keep it on the top side of my blog until the sun explodes or implodes or whenever. So go check them out by clicking on the banner or the coupon.

Weird Animal Wednesday

Tickle Me Tuesday

Funny Religious Shit

Silly Sign Saturday

My Sunshine Blogger Award

My other blogging award id the Sunshine Blogger Award. Thank you so much for this award Vickie. According to the rules, I have to give this award to 10 other deserving bloggers. I'll just pick a few so they can pick their few too.

She Who Seeks

Magaly Guerrero

Dreaming of Rosemary

Now I have to write 11 facts about myself:

1. I hate stupid drivers. Everyone should have to take a drivers Defensive Driving course and drive the "track" in order to get their license. There would be less accidents on the road.            
2. I love my husband, David. He's always thinking of me and how to make me happy. I do the same for him. I love making him laugh.                                                                                                                        
3. I have a sweet love for Boston Terriers and French Bulldogs. They are so cute, and baby like.                                                                                                                                   
4. I am a Walking Dead fan. Just the idea of a Zombie Apocolypse happening makes me all giddy inside.                                                                                                                               
5. I have a crazy appetite for Italian and Asian food. I hate going out for it and would rather cook my own once I find out how to make it. I watch cooking shows on the web to learn techniques for preparation of a meal I want to make.                                                            
6. I love to take drives to places I've never been to here in Texas. David and I are the type of couple that likes to drive the back roads and visit small towns.                                             
7. I love to sew. If I see something I like, I'll find the pattern on the web and make it.                
8. I love to garden in raised beds. There is something about working with the rich earth and making things grow. It grounds me - no pun intended. I'm trying to talk David into building a screen enclosure to keep the squirrels and birds out of the veggies.                                       
9. I have two vices. I am a chocoholic, and a coffee whore.                                                            
10. I love reading books. Not like the Kindle but from a real book. I love the feel and smell of books. I have quite a library                                                                                                             
11.  I'm a web surfer. I love looking for cool and funny stuff to post on my blog. Since I have nothing else to do all day, I spend the majority of my time talking to friends and searching for things.

Oy Vey !!! I'm Gonna Die A Happy Camper!

One of me dear friends, and wonderful blogger, Vickie, over at Aoilbheal's Lair  slapped me upside the head with TWO AWARDS!! OMG!! YES!! I know, right?!

Now because the ABC Award is so extensive I'll do that one first and do the other award tomorrow.

Awesome Blog Content Award

So, according to the rules from Vickie's blog, I have to:

1. Download the award and add it to your acceptance post.
2. Nominate a few bloggers to get whopped upside the head with this award.
3. Take each letter of the alphabet and use it to tell something about yourself.

The bloggers that I am passing this on to are:

Old Baggs N Stuffed Shirts
Airing My Dirty Laundry
She Who Seeks

A.  Adventurous -  I love to try new things.

B. Baking -  I fucking love baking.

C. Coffee-slut - I am absotively, posolutely sure I bleed coffee.

D. Is for David, my husband/sexy beast/plaything. I love him dearly and completely.

E. Elegance- I strive for elegance on a budget. Whether it's for my home of my clothes.

F. Funny-  I try to be serious most of the time, but my funny side sneaks out quite a bit and tends to run wild when it escapes.

G. Green is my favorite color. But even more if it has a hint of blue in it.

H.  I am a Tom Hiddleston fan. He's bringing SEXY back.

Lucy- My awesome little Boston

I.  I love Italian food.

J. Junk food - I can't help myself. I try to eat right but if junk food is nearby I'll eat it.

K.  Kites - I love to fly kites. My favorite place to by them is intothewind.com. It's a Mecca for kite people.

L. Lucy - My little Boston baby. She's such a cuddle girl. She loves to be loved.

M.  Music - My favorite music to listen to is Smooth Jazz. It's not elevator muzak either.

N.  Nutella -  I am a Nutella freak.

O.  I love the sound of the Ocean waves crashing on the shore. It soothes me.

P.  My first name is Patricia

Q.  I am the fucking Queen of everything!

R.  I love rainy days, sitting by the window in the living room while sipping coffee and watching it rain.

S.  I wish I could get more sleep, but it's not possible. I can go days without it and then crash for 14 to 16 hours, and then I start all over again without it.

T.  I am a very tidy person.

U.  I hate unruly children.

V.  I hate Valentines Day. Please don't ask why.

W.  I'm a solitary Witch. I don't like practicing in a coven because there are too many people with stupid agendas and politics.

X.  I hate x-rated rap music. Especially when it's being played loud and there are children within ear-shot. It should be outlawed.

Y.  This is the Year of the Wood Horse, and it's extra special for me because I turn 60 this year. So it will be a great year for me.

Z.  I want more zzzzzzz's